We hold these truths to be right on the mark:

The old must always be replaced by the new. If it is the case that the replacing newness is in fact deceptive and in fact older or as old as the oldness it is replenishing, then the new does not replace the old.

If a tree falls in the forest, it is art ; especially if there is no one around.

A wet nurse alleviates boredom for a short time only. It is far better to be a revolutionary. A revolution must be composed of all action and ideology but it must never complete its course. A successful revolution heralds the end of a revolution and the end of the revolution is stagnation once again. Thus revolution leads to more boredom. There is only this alternative among the many other choices which may be as good: Revolution should be constant and all revolutions should fail repeatedly. It is counter-revolutionary to change or alter society in any way.

Those involved in the revolution should shower on a regular basis as this prevents rotting of the flesh and stagnation. Stagnation is the greatest enemy next to enemies, who are far greater. The worst nation is stagnation and the nation which nobody likes. Those who do not shower will be subject to great ridicule and shame by fellow conspirators.

Everything is random. Even time is random but we can not prove that since we measure time with place- the moving hands of a clock inching around, searching, and watching the movements of the sun go up and then go down. Planets are falsely arbitrary. They are against the revolution. We must struggle hard to free time from the tight grasp of place.

We believe in something or nothing. The choice is ours and it was given to us to make. If we wish we may choose not to make the choice but then it is already too late. It is always late if it is not early. There is always MORE. Even less is more.

The revolution comes in many forms, boxes, and flavors packaged for the individual or the masses. There is only one revolution, even if those involved in other revolutions past or future are not aware of their unity or disunity. The revolution includes and excludes everyone.

Change is the only constant and we reserve the right to make change inconstant and revert back to constancy without fluctuation.

We also reserve full exclusive rights to change our minds at any point in the revolution and believe in other truths that may contradict the truths we really believe in, written or unwritten. If this is to occur, we may explode or sabotage others who don't get it.

This has been an anti-public anti-service anti-announcement from:

THE ABSURDIST REVOLUTION

(To those who have valid contradictions to these truths- Your objections are just exceptions to prove the point.)